|LOVED BABY written by Sarah Philpott|
Do you know someone who has experienced a miscarriage or infant death? Are you at a loss of how to comfort them? Perhaps you’ve experienced a loss and someone’s words of “comfort” were hurtful.
Everyone reacts differently when they hear the news.
I felt great when I went for my twelve-week pregnancy check-up. Surprised that the doctor wanted to do an ultrasound, I wished I had asked my husband or someone to come enjoy it with me.
On the ultrasound, I saw the profile of our baby’s sweet face. His elbow was bent with his hand up. Five perfectly shaped fingers extended as if to say, “hi.”
His body was still. His heart, silent. Our beloved baby had been welcomed into heaven.
And I was ushered into the first stage of grief. In the coming weeks, I experienced something I had never fully understood. My perception of what women go through after a miscarriage changed drastically.
October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. One in four American women experiences pregnancy loss. Just as all mothers’ birthing stories are unique, so are the journeys of those who experience pregnancy and infant loss.
Sarah Philpott has penned a new book, Loved Baby, which addresses nearly every aspect of this journey. She’s not a medical doctor, but she’s used the research skills, gained while earning her doctorate in education, to enlighten readers about the various facets of pregnancy and infant loss. She expresses empathy by sharing her own story of two miscarriages. She offers encouragement by sharing her heart for Jesus.
Brief comments from other women who’ve experienced loss are sprinkled throughout the book as well. Readers may not identify with all the emotions presented, but they’ll come away with a greater understanding of just how varied responses to grief can be.
This book confirms that when dealing with pregnancy loss, there is no one-consolation-fits-all. There is no pat answer that will comfort every person in every situation. Everyone grieves and heals differently.
|LOVED BABY book and bracelet bundle|
Many mothers choose to heal through a special remembrance of their little one. Some plant trees, some start a charity, and some release balloons on the due date. Another way to remember their loved babies is to wear a special piece of jewelry.
Fashion and Compassion, a company that gives a portion of their sales to various causes, is offering a special, "loved" baby bracelet with the Loved Baby book through the month of October. I don’t make any money off of this promotion. I’m just sharing the info with you in case you’re interested.
Loved Baby is a hardcover book containing thirty-one “devotions.” Some have one Bible verse while others include several scriptures. At the end of every chapter is a short prayer such as,
Lord, I pray for peace to fill my soul, for I know my child is in heaven. Amen.
Also, at the end of each chapter is something called “Soul Work.” Here, usually, one or two suggestions are given for the reader. A few examples of these are:
Do you have answers to your loss? Do you have further questions? Write them down. Schedule a time to speak with your healthcare provider or conduct a preliminary research from reputable sites. (Soul Work for devotion #7)
Write down every hurtful comment on a single sheet of paper. Get a marker and mark them out. Then throw out the paper.
Now, write down every single thing someone did that showed kindness. It might be something as simple as a hug or a sympathetic glance. Meditate on these acts of love. (Soul Work for devotion #12)
Some “Soul Work” sections suggest getting into God’s Word.
Reread Job 3:11-19. Underline all the words that describe heaven.
It can be helpful to visualize your child in heaven. Who is there with your child? Write a letter to them asking them to watch over your little one. (Soul Work for devotion #14)
What I gather from these “Soul Work” sections, and from the rest of the book as well, is that Philpott wishes to meet women wherever they are in their spiritual walk.
The initial chapters deal with anger, hurt, and confusion after a miscarriage. A large portion of the devotions is more informational than meditational.
Some topics addressed are: dealing with emotions and changes in the body, communicating with family members and with medical providers. How to deal with social media, Mother’s Day, and receiving promotional mail for baby products, plus a multitude of other topics readers may not have considered. Philpott covers it all.
However, as the book progresses, I notice an increasing emphasis on trusting and building a relationship with Jesus Christ. The book ends with a call to accept the saving grace of Jesus.
I think Loved Baby would be a good book to give to someone who is struggling after a miscarriage. I think it would especially appeal to those who are new to the Christian faith or to those who may not know of the comfort, hope, and joy that only Christ can give them.