"It's Cancer" |
“It’s
Cancer”—Finding Help and Hope on the Road to Recovery was
recently released by Straight Street Books. There’s a great need for this book
because statistics state one out of every two men, and one out of every three
women, will hear those two words no one wants to hear. "It's cancer."
While statistics sound cold and clinical, this book
is not. Rather it is full of hope, encouragement, and helpful guidance.
I am delighted to have the author and cancer
survivor, Venita McCart, as a guest on my blog this week. Venita and I became
friends a few years ago and I’ve eagerly waited for her to write this book. Not
only does it offer help for those diagnosed with cancer, but it is enlightening
and beneficial for the rest of us to read.
In “It’s
Cancer”—, Venita shares her own experiences as well as those of others. The
back copy reads, “Come alongside patient
survivors as they successfully overcome the obstacles of weighing treatment
advice, managing caregivers, establishing attainable goals, realigning
expectations, and embracing a new normal during and after cancer. Grapple with
the tough questions about suffering, death, and heaven. Learn the value of
being your own advocate, accepting setbacks, choosing gratitude, and developing
a closer relationship with God.”
As the founder of Faith Force Cancer Support
Ministry in Illinois, Venita continues to validate the realities of cancer
while offering strategies for finding inner joy and peace. I’m delighted to
have her share with us today.
Venita, will you share a little about when you first learned you
had lung cancer?
My general practitioner, a friend of
many years, after an annual physical, phoned me. She had a made a decision to
do a chest x-ray, based on an intuitive feeling. Immediately before she called,
I had an experience in which God had spoken to my heart that something dark was
coming.
I realized the announcement of cancer
was the darkness God had revealed to me just moments before. I’m sure part of
it was shock, but I truly was not afraid. A few days later when I heard the
official diagnosis and treatment plan from my newly acquired oncologist, I just
wanted to run away for a few minutes. But then I remembered God’s presence that
day immediately before the phone call, and I knew I would get through it.
Tell us about Faith Force Cancer Support Ministry. What
are some of the things you do through this ministry? Is it only available in
Illinois?
I started Faith Force after a few
years of being contacted by cancer patients and loved ones, looking for someone
to talk to who had ‘been there’. I visited them, invited them into in my home,
sent cards, spoke with them on the phone-- any way I could help them. They all
were looking for hope. Starting a support group to encourage them and give them
hope that comes from God seemed the thing to do. We have met in a group setting
since 2005.
Our group meetings offer active
listening, sharing, understanding and encouragement from the perspective of
faith. Those experiencing cancer firsthand, or those who are loved ones, can
connect. I share a devotion in each meeting, and we have a time for sharing. We
also exchange prayer requests that so frequently come our way. We occasionally
participate in organized events to raise awareness.
Outside the meetings, [my husband] Gary
and I make ourselves available to visit, contact and connect with cancer
patients and their loved ones. As we can, when invited, we visit hospitals,
infusion rooms, waiting rooms, homes—anywhere we may be of help.
Illinois is the only place we have a
group, although I have been contacted and have connected with people from all
over the U.S. It is my heart’s desire to see other groups begin. There is
nothing more deeply needed or beneficial than cancer survivors helping
other patient-survivors and families cope and hope, spiritually and emotionally.
Not only do you help people through the support ministry but
also you speak to groups and organizations as well, correct?
I do some speaking to small groups,
churches, at cancer event gatherings, and have spoken to groups of oncology
nurses in training. Of course, I speak at our cancer support group meetings as
well.
Getting back to your book, It’s
Cancer—Finding Help and Hope on the Road to Recovery--what prompted you to write it?
I was always a writer. So when I began
writing for my support group meetings it was nothing unusual. Writing the book
is an effort to reach out to others beyond my geographical area.
Cancer and despair are often closely
related. I do not want anyone dealing with cancer to go into despair.
As a Christian who has traveled this
road, I want to offer God’s hope from the perspective of faith in a way that is
realistic and practical.
The world has many answers. We, as
Christians, have the opportunity to help cancer patients with the very best
news, and greatest source of strength, courage and hope possible.
You talk in your book about cancer survivors renewing their
purpose in life. After cancer has altered their lifestyles and their jobs, how
do you encourage them?
Most are deeply affected by many
issues during and after cancer. Some get well, some get better, some keep fighting,
and some face death—no cancer patient or family is exempt. Even living in
remission is an ongoing challenge. Cancer, and its after-effects, is as much psychological
battles as physical ones.
We encourage group attendees to
continue coming not only for themselves but to help others. We approach the
emotional and spiritual challenges on a personal basis within the framework of
the group. We focus on what God
teaches us about dealing with fear,
trust issues, difficult times, decision- making, suffering, life, and heaven. People
attend as long as they wish to take part.
I love the tone of your book. You offer hope and encouragement
without a sugarcoating. You know how to do this because you’ve traveled a
similar journey. For caregivers and friends, who’ve never been diagnosed with
cancer, what advice would you offer to them as they try to care for someone who
has cancer?
Saying, “It’s going to be okay,” “Oh,
you’re fine,” or, “Just trust God!” platitudes fall flat.
Try active listening, and try not to invalidate
what the patient is saying or feeling. Be real. If you don’t understand their
fears or behaviors, let them know you are trying to understand.
Don’t try to force us to exercise
more, eat more, be more positive, or to be the same as we once were. We may be
doing everything we can just to get through the day.
Keep in mind some of us feel we have
lost who we are. We may need to rebuild but aren’t sure how that works. We may
muddle our way through life for a while.
Remember people dealing with cancer are
often--if not always—dealing with grief. This can bring shock, anger, denial, and
fear to the entire circle of loved ones in a patients’ life.
Work together to get through the healing
of your grief. Don’t hesitate to get counseling if needed.
To a loved one, being there does not
seem to be enough. But to a patient-survivor, sometimes it is everything.
Stay close by, help however your loved
one will allow, and don’t forget how the little things make a great difference.
Be kind to yourself. Stay close to
your loved one, but remember your fears, needs, and feelings of inadequacy will
affect you as well. Do your best to love them and yourself.
Allow patients to make their own
decisions as much as possible.
Venita McCart |
What is the one thing you want readers to take away from your
book?
We will never understand cancer. No
one has figured out how to bring wellness to us all. Yet there is hope. We can
accept many things we do not understand, with the comfort, strength, and
promises of God.
He is good. He cares for you. He is close
to the broken-hearted. When we are open to Him, He brings renewal, in this life
and the next. Look to Him.
Thank
you for sharing with us, Venita. You are a blessing to so many people. May the Lord continue to bless you and your
ministry as you guide others in learning how to rebuild and “squeeze the
goodness out of life.”
Readers,
you can connect with Venita through FaithForce
Ministry and on her blog.
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